A certain individual who shall not be named was telling me their plans to "verbally burn" someone who was asking for a favor. They were so proud of themselves and couldn't wait to share it with me... even though I never respond positively to such "sharing." They concluded that they were "teaching" the other person a lesson, and I informed them that they don't always have to "teach someone." I hate that kind of thinking. To me it is petty and prideful. But I can be like that too sometimes. I have quite the sharp verbal arsenal at my disposal and it can be very tempting to fire when provoked. Tonight I watched "You Again," with my sisters and a friend. It made me realize how much the past can poison the present. It can be really hard sometimes to let things go. It makes me think of a line from "Divine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood." Vivi tells her daughter Sidda that she likes to "chew on a problem until all the flavors gone, and then stick it in her hair." We do that sometimes, wear our hurts like adornments, carry our pain wherever we go. Someone I love and respect once told me that "holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die." When we hold onto bitterness and anger, we are the ones who suffer. We miss out on the beauty of life around us and close ourself off to opportunities to grow and learn. People who let go of anger also experience: healthier relationships, greater spiritual and psychological well-being, less stress and hostility, lower blood pressure, fewer symptoms of depression, anxiety, and chronic pain, and a lower risk of drug and alcohol abuse. The truth is that while feelings of pride, resentment, bitterness, and anger might be comforting in the moment, they only hold us back. So here's to holding onto the things that matter, and letting the rest of it go.
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. -- Lao Tzu