Watched the office tonight and a part struck me as brilliant- Andy and the boys go roller-blading. When asked if he met anyone, he replies that he met himself, and he roller skates like a god. Later I went for my evening walk, thinking as I usually do, and kind of talking to myself. Sometimes it seems as if just when we are making progress, something comes out of nowhere and threatens to completely derail us. Not something bad necessarily, just something distracting that complicates our lives. And before you know it, our minds are reeling with questions and regrets and all kinds of things. This brain-slush is what I was experiencing tonight. Then I listened to a song that I must've heard before, but never really listened to. It's "Details in the Fabric," by Jason Mraz. I believe that it came to my awareness right when I needed it's message. After months of not liking myself, I realized tonight that I am once again happy in my own company. And it was such a beautiful feeling, like being in love. I was smiling and peaceful, and felt like the silly "fulfillment of desire" prophecy of the full moon had actually come true. It made me think of a friend of mine I hung out with recently. He said every day when he looks in the mirror he says to himself, "Look at you, you are a good looking man." He might have been kidding, but knowing him I doubt it. the point was that he was confident. He liked himself. And now I do too. And that takes us a lot further than someone else loving us ever will.“You can explore the universe looking for somebody who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and you will not find that person anywhere."
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