Sunday, January 30, 2011

Jan 30. Regroup

Today was kind of rough for me.  I have been in a kind of funk, I guess because I have a lot on my mind.  And though I believe we choose our feelings and thoughts, sometimes it is easier than others to be joyful.  When I read the book "The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire" earlier this month, I was meditating regularly and felt very confident that I would be able to achieve a so-called ocean of calm from within- a consistency of spirit and balance of emotions not easily swayed by outer forces (even stress).  But the more time has gone by and the more distracted I get, the harder it seems for me to control my emotions and thoughts.  Today especially, the focus was waning and I felt so distracted that I had to be by myself for awhile in the car and just... regroup.  And after an emotional confrontation with someone, I had to regroup again.  A new month is coming up, and now that I have a few good habits established and my path is a little more clear, I decided to set some new goals for myself.  Not resolutions, mind you... goals.  I took a look at what I've accomplished this month, what I've been able to see, do, and experience, the ups and downs, the disappointments, the setbacks, all of it.... and now I'm ready to move forward again.

Regroup: verb; to become reorganized in order to make a fresh start.

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